im lost

Did it ever happen that you feel as if you are in the middle of a big gigantic crossroad where all ways looks the same… empty, scary, confusing and no help around???

Feel like I’m in one such situation. Some time we take few really bold steps in life where we think that good or bad.. lets do it. I wonder how many people would be prepared for the bad in those situations. Never did I give a thought about it coz never did a situation like that arrive before, but now I feel that though I have jumped into a couple of things very boldly and I was never prepared for the bad that could ever happen. Deep down somewhere buried, I knew that things can sometimes go wrong, but not once did I plan for it. Lol, no one really plans for it though.
And now what??? Which path do I take?

All directions seem to be almost the same…. Tough, tedious, full of twists and turns..And also I don’t find a path which might have a near parallel path to it.
Now I realize that I’m lost…

An idea can change everything

Face book with its new farming game is rocking the chart lists. A wonderful idea to keep people online. With the privilege, that each one can get back with their own convenience. The age old concept of trying to take people back to farming and helping them leave the city life is another lovely idea. Each and every aspect that has been designed has been so carefully thought and clearly coded. Zynga which has been the backbone for this game has announced its greater success after the launch of FarmVillie on June 19th 2009. Data shows that it has been adding 1 million new users every week and at any given time there are almost 11 million users who are online.

Now I have nothing more to say than just wowwwwwww…..
I knew this game for a long time. I was not an active visitor on face book before I started playing this game. I heard about farmvilli from every one. Whoso ever I talk, tell me about this application. Suggest that I should give it a try. Initially I thought it’s just a game, and I wondered how people are spending so many hours just for that game. It really surprised me. The most interesting thing that once happened to me was when I saw my friend get up early in the morning at 5’o clock to harvest his strawberry farms. I was surprised. a person who never even bothered to get up so early whatsoever. Got up just to harvest his crop… wofff….

And then I thought I should give it a try. Finally I started Farming and I don’t know how/why/what… I started liking it.

I appreciate all the effort that went into the designing. The credit goes to Mark Skaggs and his team. I admit it has definitely broken every expected rule or social gaming. The idea itself is amazing. Who thinks about taking us back to farming at this time. Definitely no one. And every minute aspect of helping your neighbours. Calculating what you have to harvest to get benefits. Prioritizing what you want in your farm. Everything is awesome…

I'm loving it!!!

. D O T

a simple dot. doesnt even look like a significant thing. but can change the entire sentence. one can end the series with that lil dot. and it can also start another beggining after the same dot....may be its always in the way you want to look at it

is it an end, or the beginning!!!

Pocket Full of Sunshine

Natasha Bedingfield



cheers Natasha
im lov'n it!!!

My first Crush

January 27th, 2008, i saw him for the very first time. The minute i looked at him
i knew it... i couldn't take my eyes off him, what charisma!!! what grandeur did he carry with him. His very looks, strong body, and his eyes..lovely!! i just got lost in them. I kept looking at him..or rather u can call it i was staring to death. we were about to head on to a long drive.. just two of us in my sweet lil dream

and then suddenly i was awakened..huhh... i was literally being dragged away from him. then i planned for a great escape and got back for one last picture. and here it is

Audi R8 my first crush, a machine i would love to drive some time... lovely isn't he???

This picture is a lil old one, but when i was browsing for the all new 2010 Audi R8, i was even more thrilled. Awesome it is!!! more of audi here. Its outstanding features would include its super performing 5.2 engine with its 525 hp capacity and can reach an acceleration of 0-60 in almost 3.9 seconds... Apart from that it's been carved with its luxurious and sophisticated looks apart from the best interiors.

check out few of the latest pics here!!

will be back soon with more of my macho machine pretty soon

BELATED HAPPY TEACHERS DAY!!

BOSSUU..memory LOSSUU....
do you think I’m not trying to hum the latest song here
nahhh.....
I forgot something really important

as a mark of reverence my deep appreciation
for all those teachers n elders
who have directly or indirectly taught me the values of my life
who at every stage guided me to choose the best
who taught me to stand for what is right.. no matter how hard it is
and showed me the beauty of sharing, caring and being for one another

"Guru Brahmaa Guru Vishnu
Guru Devo Maheswara
Guru Saaksaat Param Brahma
Tasmai Shri Guruve Namaha"

BELATED HAPPY TEACHERS DAY!!

I miss my school time now. It was a lot fun then [:P] But something i was wondering here is, how come orkut didn’t remind me of the day?? Whatever is the occasion i find all the display pics and status messages turned on with the latest new. When YSR expired almost all the names were turned to "YSR we miss you, YRS; may his soul rip" and so on. But somehow i didn’t find the Teachers day message on any of my updates. I’m not blaming people for not reminding me (lol) but i think the day was worth being mentioned.

DEATH... equals it all

no matter how hard we run in this life race
all would be nullified by death
so, it doesn’t matter the number of credentials
that you hold but the kind of death bestowed

YSR...
may his Soul rest in peace

we all know that death is certain
if not today.. it will be our turn tomorrow...
but certain incidents qualify to be called "Inviting Death"
and i feel the tragic that took place with YSR is one such
after knowing that it is not the right time or the right condition
how can one just go ahead risking not just his lifebut others too??

This so called "It's Okay Yaar!!!" attitude costs a lot some times

Me, my buddy!!

did it ever happen that you have tonnes of things to talk about

all your ideas.. all your feelings.. incidents that have been so surprising at times..

all the funniest things, wierdest of wierd ideas.. every stupid mistake that you have done

every heartful laugh that you've had...

and then when you turn back with all this on your mind and you find no one else but the dearest of dear your own self.

Failure

“Failure is not always a mistake; it may simply be the best one can do under the circumstances. The real mistake is to stop trying”

-B. F. Skinner

Time I’ll never forget

August 18th, 2007 the grand farewell that I received from my loved ones. The mixed feeling of pain- of leaving my loved ones back home, happiness- that finally I am on my way to achieve what I have always dreamt for, excitement- of travelling new places, meeting new people. Everything looked so perfect. School time was such fun. Made some wonderful memories together with friends. Though it’s not always good that I had experienced.. those lil fights, those patch ups.. those long walks and those never ending talk. I enjoyed every moment of it.

And then came this damn recession, forced me onto the longest break in my career, and to my happiness. Everything changed. Tension piled up, always a question of what next, what could be the alternative.. Never did I so much incline towards destiny, that in this one year after school I started believing in it. Kept trying in all possible ways.. but looks like the future holds something else.. Something more beautiful… something I have never ever imagined for myself…

Two years have so passed leaving some bitter experiences, teaching me a couple of things in the hard way, giving me so much of time to know myself even better… desperately awaiting to watch what the future holds for me…

Proud to be an INDIAN… now and always

Celebrating our 62nd year of Independence..



I raise all high to salute to my mother land. This day I would like to pay my due respect for all the greatest of the great freedom fighters who have sacrificed their lives to get us this day.

Though INDIA is still being treated as a developing nation, it has definitely made its mark in the world history. Information Technology, Scientific research, Aviation, Defense, Arts.. You name it and we have our presence in it. Whatever people call us, we Indians have made a mark for ourselves. I am so proud to represent myself an INDIAN.

Reminiscence of the good old bygone days when I used to get all excited to put the paper flag onto my shoulder, with that white sports uniform and keep wishing every one “ Happy Independence Day”. It was an age when I didn’t know if the excitement was because I would be given free candy at school or was it because of the parade that I always liked to watch or because it was one off-study day at school. But whatever it was, it was just fabulous. The sight of everyone raising high for the National anthem gives me that very nice and proud feeling (Gets me those goose bumps ) The song made me so thrilled and charged as ever.



The Celebration continues..

garmagaram chai..
heavy rain slashing my patio door..
my all time fav music..

Lov n it man!!!

it means so much to me

It’s been some time now that I found myself grounded in that big deep chasm from where I found no ray of hope. Every time that I tried to find some way out, I found double the force that was pulling me more deep into it. For some time I completely lost all my power and all that strength that made me take everything so positively and so cheerfully. A sense of losing, a feeling of being defeated ruthlessly crept into my heart making it all week. And suddenly the voice that has been all the way silent spoke to me. Not about his stupid pranks or his careless trial. Nor about his muses or rants but reminded me of the lost me. Reminded me about the one that lost herself to some artificialities and hid herself far from what she really is. He made me realize what is it, which was always there with me for 23 years and then suddenly was lost somewhere. He recouped my lost potential with his one pull. Those little hands which I once held when he was about to fall, held mine when I needed them the most. The lil brother to whom I taught how to eat and how to play today taught me how to get back to myself. Thanks bro!!! Thanks for being for me.



P.S your flying kiss rode all the way to your sister :)

Our Earth

The planet is going to peril. I want to change it. And I know there are many who want to do their share of effort for this. Let’s get to discuss a couple of ways as to how we can all do that together.

1. The first important issue is, one has to understand the impact of the choices that we take. Make wise choices. Reduce the consumption of earth’s resources like... choosing goods with less packaging. Think about the products entire life cycle from manufacturing to the disposal. Replace your non-renewable resources with the renewable once like the solar and wind. Travel mindfully, cut down on your greenhouse gas emissions. Think in a more ecologically friendly way use train and local means more. I
Know it’s easy to say but it takes a lot to commitment to get to work. But anything and everything is possible

2. Make your homes healthy and more efficient going green:
• Keep a watch on the home illumination. Replace your light bulbs as they burn out with compact fluorescent models.
• Use kitchen and bathroom ventilating fans as little as possible to avoid sending too much heated or cooled air out of the house.
• Check the setting on your water heater isn't overheating your water.
• Next major saving should be with the water. Its earth’s most precious resource. Using as little of it as possible not only reduces the energy needed to transport the water from its source, process it, and send it along the pipes to people, but it helps to ensure that there's enough to go around. Fix the leaking faucets around the home right away. Use as little water as possible when cooking. Use water wisely when you are washing the dishes. In general, a shower uses little than filling up the container. Whether you prefer showers or baths keep water conservation in mind and limit the amount of water you use.
• Practice green cleaning: use baking soda, vinegar, and lime, Borax etc., as cleaning solutions to many household issues than powerful chemicals.

3. Minimize your trash and de-clutter your life:
• For many people, if trash is "out of sight, it is out of mind" as soon as it leaves their home. But that’s not the end of trash’s journey. It’s just the beginning. For every item you throw out, there's hidden waste- the raw materials that went into its production and the resources such as water and energy that fueled the process, from raw materials to finished goods to land fill. And much of that energy comes from non renewable sources. The main idea here is to reduce your trash so much that you produce no waste at all. It’s far more practical and achievable way with all the recycling and packaging practices that are catching up with today’s "Green" culture.
A few tips onto how to go about this
• Buy less. Identify the difference between what you "Need" and what you "Want"
• Be mindful of packaging. Buy fresh food that doesn’t come prepackaged. Avoid individually packaged items. Take your own shopping bag; reduce the usage of plastic bags. Opt for items in glass or other recyclable containers instead of plastic containers that can’t be recycled.
• Lengthening the life of your processions: try to opt of processions that you can handle longer. That way you would be helping with a lot of waste reduction and avoid buying new items and getting rid of the old once and also save some money.
• Recycle as many products as you can. Try to identify sources in your community where there are recycle hubs and use them. You can also turn your garbage into someone else’s gold by just donating them to the needy. Offer your used goods to another person reduce waste and fits in with the idea of reusing as much as possible.
• Disposing of electronic goods: electronics have become an important part of our lifestyle. And they have also become more prominent contributions of our homes waste. If you want to get rid of your old electronics just find an electronic recycler near to you. Or if you want to get rid of your old computer and TV don’t trash it. Donate it for reuse by facilities like charity schools or social organizations. Disposing your old vehicle. Don’t throw it into junk yards. It can be reused sometimes or can be donated. You can sometimes get a tax benefit if you donate things to charity organizations [:)]

4. Make more green diet decisions:
Be selective about where your food comes from. Go for locally produced food stuff. This way you would save all the green house gas emission form the transportation of the foods from distant places.
Go for the local farmers market which would be open just a couple of times a week but which would cater to buying fresh local and organic food.


These are all small tips, in all the various ways we can save the environment. These small issues can be a great contribution to the society.

And I feel all this education has to be done specifically at the grass root level. Little school children have to be educated with high priority about these issues. That is an age when, whatever is stressed will remain forever. We have to involve children in the green drive activates that the school undertakes. Teach them the effects of whatever we do. Such things don’t happen in a jiffy. All this is going to take some time. Persistent effort and working dedicatedly will definitely bring a change.

I would appreciate the discussion of more solutions to the issues. Pour your thought and bring in more issues to light.

Opportunity..use it

It is true that many times people fail to achieve something for lack of opportunity. But lucky are those who get an opportunity to prove their talent, hard work and the best they have in themselves. One such opportunity being provided, are by the various Talent Shows. Talent shows in Music, Dance, Art and whatever. It is really appreciable that the basic platform is being created for and by people to get the best in their respective field (thought it’s a win-win for both of them lol).

All this came to my mind when i was watching the SA RE GA MA PA lil Champs. What a show!!! Little kids all below 15 yrs of age with such lovely voices. And many among them are from such small villages of our country that If not for this show I guess it would have been real tough for them to make a mark for themselves so easily at that age. And the best part is the mentoring that all those little kids are being offered. Those kids are in such a tender age that they learn things so quick and hold it with them for a long time, wherein the need for a right guide, right guru is needed. Abhijeet and Alka Yagnikar are doing a great job.
A win-win show where everyone is getting their share of profit. More of such shows have to be conducted, not just in the music and dance arena but educational too. To bring the best in each subject by the best.

I would love to share the show links with every one

Google Chrome Operating System

I was just trying to jot down all the uses a computer can offer without an internet connection. And it turned out to be such a small list, unless some specified software was being used for some very specific purpose. And when you use internet the list goes endless. This clearly demarcates the vast use an internet connection can offer. And when I talk about internet the first and foremost thing that pops up into my mind is GOOGLE. It has revolutionized the way internet access is done. Through the years it has added so many features to itself that it’s no more just a search engine. With its new venture Google Chrome Operating systems I guess its gona add another feather to its cap.



Chrome OS would be designed using the Linux Open Source and is being initially targeted at Netbooks. It should be all set for a grand release by the second half of 2010. Its main features would be speed, simplicity and security. The user interface would be made minimal to stay out of our way, and most of the user experience takes place on the web. Just as the Google Chrome browser, they are completely redesigning the underlying security architecture of the OS so that we users will not have to deal with viruses, malware and other security updates.

But the clear part here is Google has literally dropped a nuclear bomb on its chief rival, Microsoft. The sales of Netbooks have increased tremendously these days and there are lots of them that are running on Windows XP. Windows being a very old one which has been initially built for Pentium 3s and 4s. The new Chrome OS would be capable of both x86 architecture and ARM chips and will be working with multiple OEMs to increase the number of netbooks to an even greater number. Another important issue here is, just as the browser the Operating system will also be open- sourced. But is there any chance of Microsoft open-sourcing its windows??

After the release of Chrome OS what about Android? (The Mobile Operating System running on Linux, developed by Google). Google does agree of some overlap between the two, but the basic difference remains that Android cannot be run on x86 architecture, where as Chrome would. And another difference that Chrome wants to emphasize is including apps that are not standard browser based apps.

Google plans for this release very soon. No wonder if it drops the same time, when Microsoft is out with its wildcard Windows 7

music

When the world around me seems like hell, when everything I try works out to be a complete disaster the only medicine that can calm all my senses and make my brain work is some good music. What a gift we found for our self. Not just trouble or pain, any situation and music can change the way u feel. It’s not just something that I am saying here. But its proven science that we are hardwired to interpret and react to a piece of music. You get happier when you listen to good music… and when we are dull we tend to listen to the slow music where we try to find peace with it.

My dad gets completely freaked up when he finds me reading a book with the music on. It’s as if I am committing the greatest sin of my life.. lol. But I try hard to make him understand that it’s scientifically proved that music will enhance the learning skill. The only thing that separates a genius from an average person is his learning ability, which can be improved with music. People learn through music and their minds grow faster when it is implemented in the right way. It’s just a myth that is being continued for some time now that they both don’t gel well.

It gets hard to put it in words sometimes the most beautiful things….

bye bye Rockstar

May his soul rest in Peace...

Keeping the Passion of love Alive

Imagine that you've decided to build a fire in your fireplace. You carefully choose the logs, the kindling, and after lighting a match to start the fire, you watch over it until you're sure the fire is burning strongly and steadily. Then you sit back and enjoy the comforting warmth, the delightful play of the flames, the magical light. You don't need to be as vigilant about keeping the fire blazing, since it has enough fuel for now. but at some point, when you notice its getting a little colder, or the light is growing dim, you realize that the fire needs your attention again, and so you rouse yourself from whatever you've been doing and add more wood, or adjust the position of the logs so that, once more, the flames can rise high.

Even if you've neglected the fire for a while, even if it appears to have died out, you see that the embers still radiate a deep, orange glow that can only be created by hours of extreme heat. The embers are deceptive, and they contain great power within their quiet light. Although by themselves they produce no flames, they can ignite a newly added piece of wood in seconds, suddenly rekindling the full force of the fire, transforming the dormant coals into a roaring blaze.

We can correlate the passion between two lovers by thinking about what we intuitively know about building and maintaining a fire. When you first meet someone and fall in love, you carefully court and seduce him or her, adding the right amount of intimacy, the perfect amount of commitment until the fire of passion flares up between your hearts and your bodies. For a while, this blaze burns brightly on its own and you grow accustomed to the joy it brings into your life.

But one day, you realize there is less light, less heat between you and your mate, and that in fact, it’s been that way for some time now. You don’t feel the same intense degree of physical attraction, the same desire to unite, and the same stimulation you once felt with each other.

How many people ask themselves, at this critical point in a love affair, the fire of passion has died down simply because no one has been tending it, because no one has added the fuel necessary to keep it burning? How many people walk away from the smoking embers of their marriage, certain that the fire has died out, without noticing that the coals of love still contain enough heat to reignite into flames, if only they are given a chance?

Respect the fire of passion, the fire of love. Understand that to stay alive; it needs to be honored, to be cared for, and to be tended as diligently as you would tend a fire you had built in the wilderness to help keep you warm and sage from harm. Feed the fire of your love with kindness, Communication, appreciation and gratitude, and it will always blaze strong and brightly for you...



A small story that I felt was so true.. That I wanted it here.
-From the Chicken soup for the Romantic Soul

Love can some times be magic...
but magic can some times be just an illusion

wiki

On a day to day basis, there are so many things that we use a lot and yet we undermine or do not appreciate the beauty of those things. We all know that the best search engine is The MOTHER “Google”; I call it so, because they say that if it is not in Google, it does even exits. [:P] Anyways I did not start here to emphasize the importance of Google which is very well known, but to talk about Wikipedia.

It’s considered as one of the best free encyclopedia. Any Google search I make, and wiki pages lie on the top of the list. An online editable encyclopedia, like everyone else I questioned if it could be really that authenticated. And after I have used and read how the editable process goes by and the voluntary work that so many people do, I appreciate it even more now. The idea to make an encyclopedia available so easy is laudable. I was surprised to read about the number of articles that it carries, the different languages that it can be translate, the easy way to edit, the manner in which an edit will be approved, the history page which helps to track the editing and the neutrality that the website maintains in its contents. Any topic that you want, you do a wiki search and that will give you an idea of what it is, what it can do and so on. All are pretty appreciable. I am looking forward to see the wiki books very soon.

Check out the pages below to know more about it
Wiki

Destiny

if we think we can fight against our destiny...
if we think we can change whats writen for us
let me tell you oh boy
its a big NO...

this is another example for that

check it out!!

the essential

people struggle all through their life
try to get all the bloody comforts
no stopping at any point...

you get one and then
keep looking for the next
next best, that can make one more happy

a child finishes his/her high school
thinking it would be an end to his problems
everything will be easy then after

but no..

he faces the challenges of college
he is made to think
that college would be the end of the troubles

but no..

he faces a job next
and thinks if he can make a mark there
that will be an end

but no..

slowly one understands that
this is a circle that he is in..
with no beginning and no end to it
just as one problem stops
the other pops up reminding him of its presence

what good is all the struggle
without those couple hrs of sleep

you have been working all through
satisfying yourself at times and
satisfying your loved ones..
what good is all the struggle
Without those couple hrs of sleep..

Cricket Fever

Cricket in India is no less than a religion. People worship it day in and day out. I have seen so many ardent fans of cricket in my own group with no gender difference. As a kid i had the privilege of being raised in a big joint family with a grandpa, four uncle & aunts, 8 kids, all together. And in those days, if by any chance the cricket season started there would be nothing else allowed to be aired other than CRICKET. Guys would eat, sleep, and move just around that one black and white TV with all eyes over it. Those high5's, those jumps, those sitting on the toes, those boos. I remember all of those. That was when i had my so called cricket education!! Go out of the house, and i would find my brothers always with a bat and ball, screaming, shouting, yelling at each other for that one wicket or that one run. I call it real fun.

Through the years many things have changed. Over families have moved apart and few people have left and joined our sweet little family but one thing that has never changed is the amount of excitement that bumps up when we all watch cricket together. I always wondered if it was because of the game or was it within us. And then i thought that the combination is good :)

I don’t call myself to be a great cricket devotee. But sure, i know what series is going on off lately. And make sure that i do watch if it’s "My team INDIA” playing. And somehow I happened to find out that this one game has changed the very face of my country so much. It has now become one of the most happening industries in India. It generates more than a $1.5 billion and that’s a whole lot of money I guess. The BCCI is the richest cricket association of all the countries that surely adds to the cheering. The game which stated as a once a while event now changed, that it has a Twenty20 or an IPL going on every now and then. The game which had a sunil gavaskar, a kapil dev, a sachin tendulkar, a ganguly has been added with many other awesome players who have contributed so much to the game. Allz good as long as the sponsors are happy making loads of money, the players pockets full both playing and posing themselves off to the advertisers and as long as India keeps winning :) Awaiting for some spectacular T20 series… Happy Cricketing!!

Decision

Peeping back into the past… a couple of years back, I was never given the liberty to take my own decisions.It was always my mom and dad who decided things for me...

Which school to go?
Which transport to take?
What to eat?
What to play with?

But that was all when I was very small. When I didn’t even know how to question. Gradually I started understanding things. That was when the reasoning started and I kept asking them why not that, why this???

Math as a subject. why.. Why not something else?
Girls college....... why.. Why not something different?
Late night movie with friends... why... Why not once in a while?

My parents decided almost everything for me
What to do, what not to do.
Where to go, where not to go.
I was so upset…. Always used to argue… how will I learn things if you don’t let me make mistakes.If you dont give me the control..

and then suddenly things changed...
they gave me the liberty of taking my own decisions

I want go to America, be an independent girl, do my work in my own way… and they said YES… upto you.

At first every things was good... like it usually is. I loved all the freedom, all the individuality which was in my work. Slowly everything was in my control. I was the boss of my own life, I could take any decision I wanted to take. Slowly things were getting bigger and bigger. Questions about my future. Questions of peace of mind, questions of integrity, questions of self respect…. All stated to pop up. And it was getting so tough to handle things. Always had the question of “am I doing it right?” in my mind. I asked my parents each time if what I am in was right… was it right for me, was it right for them. But then I realized I will no more be getting any “To-Do” from them. The only answer that I now get is “You are big enough, you can make your own decisions, go for whatever u think is right!!!”

Huhhh!!

i hate it now. Hate it more than what I hated when I was restricted. I wish they could still take my decisions. Huhh!! But I guess it’s too late. I do not have the control which I can give back nor can they take it. Taking decisions is so hard hitting at times. So much to think about so little. The responsibility that comes along with it is so huge.

And now when i argue with my mom, Why the hell do you guys allow me to take my own decisions? And she says, the time to be protective is over. The time you be responsible is up!!

Women...... Oh Women!!

sm thing i wanted to share from my collection...:)

If you are well dressed,
she thinks you are a play boy
If you are not
she thinks u are a beggar

If you kiss her,
she thinks you are not a gentleman
if you dont
she thinks you are not a man

If you praise her
she thinks you are a lier
if you dont
she thinks you are good for nothing

If you vist her often
she thinks u are boring
if you dont
she accuses u for double crossing

if you visit another girl
she accuses you for being a cheat
if she is visited by another guy
she says "Oh!! its natural, we are girls"

if you propose love within a brief time,
u are a fresh guy
if you propose love later
she wonders why?

if you are jealous
she says its bad
if you are not
she doubts your love n is not glad

if you attempt romance
she things you dont respect her
if you dont
she thinks you dont like her

if you listen
she wants to talk
if you wana talk
she too wants to talk

Oh Woman!!!!

you are so simple, Duh
yet so complex....

you are so weak, Duh
yet so powerful...

you are so confusing, Duh
yet so desirable...

bottled water

what good is the bottled water doing to us??
except for producing more trash than ever.


check it out in detail!!

Summer evening...

Summer time, 8.30 in the evening, with the light breeze rustling through my patio door. The lil sparrows twittering as lovely as ever. The lil bee bee’ing above my daisy pot, the clam slow music. everything seems so lovely…. Feel like a perfect summer evening after a long time. I think about all my lovely evenings that I have spent with my family and friends. Me and pallu on the roof top, talking about everything and nothing sometimes… those loud laughter’s, those stupid gossips, those silent staring… all those seem as fresh as these daisies J leaving a smile on my face. 7.30 in the evening and my mom would be home with the hot samosas, bajjis.. and we would have the endless talk about all that happened, and my mom setting examples of what to be and what not to be. Lovely!!!! And 9 o clock and the fight begins for the remote… one with KBC, one with saas bahu soaps but new channels always win over the others. I miss those days now. They were some of the best moments I will ever remember. It seems we realize the value of some things only when you are away from it. I guess that is the beauty of parting from some things. Those small issues end up making the whole difference.

These life stages are also so funny. We just don’t realize all these when we have them, and by the time we do, we end up being far from them. This learning process seems so bad at times. But I’m glad that I at least now, I have learnt them. So that the next time I find them, I will treasure those. Life is all about learning. We understand a few things only when we learn it the hard way. It never sets in the mind when someone tells us the consequences.. I was so busy with my life some time back that I now feel that I haven’t spent quality time with my mom and dad. I made some strong decisions in life that I didn’t think of leaving my brother all alone… It hurts me now. That I left him at a time when he needed me the most as a friend, as his teacher, as his guide, as his partner in crime [:P] sorry bro!!!

All these things leave me with a heavy heart. What have I done!! Why have I done that?? Dollar dreams!! Uncle Sam has betrayed me. Came here with so many hopes!! Thought just a few years away from my favorite things and then I will be rewarded with the best ever. But I was wrong… whatever might be the reason of this slump in the economy. It has changed my plans. I will have to re-evaluate things. And this time I have learnt lesson of not going behind the things that will not last a while… But the best thing about this whole thing is that it has left me so strong that I have the courage to stand up and face whatever odds that might pop up. Thanks you America for that!!

Anyways I don’t wana end this lovely summer evening with a tear. Whatever happens, happens for our good. I am enjoying this learning too!!!

celebration

check out my new album in my scrapblog...

http://www.scrapblog.com/viewer/viewer.aspx?sbid=1824617




reps are appreciated!!!

80 hrs..

Its 5 weeks now that i have made any posts into my blog
and when i look back to see what caught me up this whole time it i F.R.I.E.N.D.S...:)
i don't know why but I'm so happy to say that i have finished the entire 10 seasons of this lovely show.. i just loved it so much that i kept watching it. Not just the show,but the bloopers too... and the only thing that i can say is i kept laughing and laughing and laughing....
and in the end when i have calculated that i have spent (10seasons*24shows*20min each=80hrs/3+ days on the whole) i couldn't stop but still keep laughing at the whole thing..

this very idea began when i have seen my friends enjoying like hell with this show.. then i didn't know that it was this fun. a great show put up by David and Martha. i love all the 6 lovely characters and the best was the "How ya doing!!!" guy :)

the beginning was too good. i can still not forget a couple of episodes which made me laugh my guts out. and the shows music, hats off to it too. but the whole thing went a lil boring to the end.. may be the 9th season or so.. not that catchy but on the whole a lovely show... a must watch i say!!!

and in the mean time before i get addicted to another sitcom i would go love blogging :)

my US states knowledge

its been almost 2years that i have been in US and just wanted to test my awareness with the US states.. and to my surprise.. i havent even cleared the 3rd grade in that. Terrible it was!!!! That made me look for some flash games to brush my knowledge in that area. Found some good stuff...

this could help some one learn some Geography now.... :)
here goes the link... Enjoy!!!
http://www.pibmug.com/files/map_test.swf

lady ga ga

Music really acts as a stress reliever all the time...i love this one now!!!

The other end of the line

a good movie after a long day leaves us with such good a feeling...
i guess "the other end of the line" can serve that purpose.
another movie based on outsourcing, talking about our Mumbai :)
Jesse Metcalfe looked pretty handsome in the movie and shiya was good too in a couple of her costumes. Over all a one time watch movie

Folkes interested in the movie can get the link below.

Part 1

Part 2

FRIENDS

Nothing can beat the happiness of meeting old buddies after a longtime. So Rejuvenating. In this alien country catching up with my old buddies was like meeting my family again. Felt at home for some time. You don’t have to worry what someone is gona think about what you say or what you do. U get the chance of being completely yourself. I don’t know if i have put my words clear enough here, i don’t mean that i am not myself the rest of the time. It just means that whatever it is.. i dont have the fear of losing my best buddies. And that makes it a whole lot of different. They are the people you have not grown up with, you just caught up with them some time back because there were some similarities in the way you think and you have become friends even before you realize. They are the people with whom you can just be yourself, tell them the most silliest things, you don’t mind they laughing at you, those suggestions which you don’t mind taking even if it looks like cribbing, friends with whom you can share everything and you know they will keep your secrets. Friends with whom you fight, and know everything will be fine very soon and you could have a blast again. Those with whom you cannot be angry for a long time no matter how hard you try. Whatever this is, this bond is amazing. You don’t expect anything more than that friendship to continue.

recession

Every morning I try to frame a new positive quote for the day, so that I can stay strong and be bold to take whatever comes my way. But I guess all the positive quotes are coming to an end now. I am tired of being strong. The US economy is going down-n- down every day. Had hope about the status before but now everything seems so bleak. Every morning I here that loads of people have been fired, so many are out of jobs. And I consider myself so lucky that I am not in that bad a position, as the others are. At least I have someone back home who can still take care of me as lovingly as they ever. There are so many well experienced people who have a family, who they have to support at the end of the day, and they are all jobless now. It’s all so bad!!! It’s not a problem forum kind of stuff that I want to open here. But I just want to think if all this pain is worth taking?

Do I have to give so much of mental strain every minute that I do not even have a nice sleep at the end of the day? Is it all right giving so much of pain to my parents who are so far away from me, thinking every minute about what I would be facing in this alien place? Is this United States worth all this??? We Indians have been working so much, giving our best to this country. What would have been the status of this US if not the huge Asian population? Can these guys work as hard as an Asian does? No ways!!! I now think if all we Indian would have worked this hard for our mother land, not expecting the great benefits this country offers, it would have been a brighter more vibrant India by now.

At least I do not have to worry about being thrown out of the country there. And more importantly I can survive happily even with a 100 bucks in my pocket. I will not have to worry about my credit card payments all the while. I will not have to worry about the Overdraft fee or the heavy APR that I would be paying at the end of the day. It’s true that I will have no more of Aeropostale, Abercrombie & Fitch, and No more Hollister, Coach Bags, Prada glasses and Burberry perfumes. But if I want, I can freak out with my friend without the thought that I would be given a ticket, I will not have to worry about my credit history and rather relax at the pani poori bandi near my house. It’s said that “The grass is always greener on the other side” I don’t know if I want to imply to that or say that I have discovered my real longingness to go back home now. For good or bad, recession has taught me new things. I am done thinking about my status, thinking about my bank loan, thinking about all the questions that I will have to face of being jobless.

Heat is getting ONN

It was all not this bad before
and now i will really have to say the heat is getting ON
Recession is giving me a really tough time now
i was enjoying all the time that i got so far
but now the thought that what would happen in the near future is bothering me a lot
Irritation is mounting to the peak
a sense of insecurity is fast creeping onto me
now what do i do?
Where do i go?
what is the best thing for me now
all these questions bother me so much now

awesome video

they are few things which seem so unrelated to your life yet sometimes they bring joy to our heart.. and this video is one of that kind...

A slumdog, with no proper food to eat, bed to sleep, and water to drink manages to give his best with whatever he is dealing with. This video teaches that the real education in life does not lie in the sophisticated classrooms or the big books. The stubborn reason to survive teaches it all. Everything seems alien before we try it out. It’s just the first one step that is difficult, and once you are into it, we will gain all the courage to fight it...

SILENCE

Does silence mean that you are sad about something?
Does it mean that you hate what you are doing?
Does silence mean that there is something bothering you a lot?
Does it mean that you wana cry out loud?


may be it doesn’t!!


It can also mean that i want some space for myself now...

CHANGE... at times i hate it

“Nothing is Permanent but change” someone great said this and it is so true. Everything around us, with us keeps changing and that is the final thing. This one quote gives me so much of strength.. but sometimes i hate it so much that things change..

In this journey called life, we get to meet so many people; we talk to so many. There are few who just come in like a fast blowing wind and go out the way they came ,and a few who come but will make a place in our heart forever. U make so many good, in fact great memories with them that no matter how far they again go from you they will stay with you forever. Their very though brings a smile on your face, strength in your heart and sometimes a tear on your eye..

this goes for my very good friend divya.. I will miss you so much :)

when was the last time you saw a butterfly??

i just kept thinking when i was asked this question. "When was the last time I saw a butterfly?" I had to strain so much to think when exactly I saw one. And I also fail to answer promptly to it because it’s been so long that I saw one really. It was as a kid when I used to run from one bush to another in the park, trying hard to catch the little angle and my brother running behind the dragon fly calling it as his Helicopter. Probably that was the last time I guess that I saw one really! It’s such a sad thing. Everything has been changing since then. We moved to a different place, a tall complex surrounded by tens of other even taller complex, with no greenery around, no more parks to play around or chase behind the little butterfly or dragon fly any more… I haven’t seen a sparrow since then nor have taken the earthworm into my hand. The future now seems to be even more frightful. Probably I will end up in a Zoo Park or a Museum showing my kids how a butterfly looked like. Appalling isn’t it!!!
We humans are so selfish and unfair. We all have walked our way and distributed this land for ourselves. We have completely ignored the rest who are also equally part of this very planet. What about all the animals, plants, insects and the rest? We have encroached into the rest of the area too knowingly or unknowingly. And now the situation is slowly getting out of our hand. The ecosystem is going topsy-turvy. So many species are almost on the verge of extinction. The polar ice caps are melting; the ozone is all getting depleted. Global temperatures are increasing. We are adding the human population every second and are ignoring the rest. Every single move and we are adding to the destructions list, leaving no scope for the future to be any better.
Nations and individuals talk about the economic meltdown. But how many of us are thinking about the eco destruction that has already taken place long time, which is almost on the verge of an end. Join hands to save this earth. Think about the situation. React and Act to it. There are so many ways that every individual as a drop can do, to fill the mighty ocean. Just that everyone has to give it a thought.

L.O.V.E

to finish strong

It gets so tought when we are almost to the end, and thats the time when most of us tend to give up. It is the WILL to finish strong that would make all the difference. People are not gona remember all that happened in the beggining and in the middle, but the END.

A Small Story…

A boy and a girl were playing together. The boy had a collection of marbles. The girl had some sweets with her. The boy told the girl that he will give her all his marbles in exchange for her sweets. The girl agreed.The boy kept the biggest and the most beautiful marble aside and gave the rest to the girl. The girl gave him all her sweets as she had promised.That night, the girl slept peacefully. But the boy couldn't sleep as he kept wondering if the girl had hidden some sweets from him the way he had hidden his best marble.

Moral of the story: If you don't give your hundred percent in a relationship, you'll always keep doubting if the other person has given his/her hundred percent.. Give your hundred percent to everything you do and sleep peacefully

A shoulder

Was going through a post in another blog and couldn’t resist from not posting it in mine. It’s a small story that goes about this way.....

A mom asks her small kid what he thinks was the most important part of his body??
The kid listens to the questions. Thinks for a while and says 'my ears mom'. Who assumed sound to be very important for all humans. Mom shrugs off saying "this is not the right answer" "there are many deaf people who found ways to survive though"

Time passed by and the kid came across the same question again, and now he thought himself to be a lil wise enough to answer the question with all the maturity he thought he had gained and then he answered "Mom, sight is very important to us. So i guess the most important part should be our eyes" Mom refutes saying “you are learning very fast. But there are many blind people leading life. I’m afraid that’s not the right answer"

Years passed by and he kept trying different answers, stumped all the time.

and then

suddenly his grandfather died one day. Everyone was in deep pain, his dad was in all grief. He saw his dad crying, which was not usual at all. And during his time to say a final good bye to his grandpa his mom asked him again "What is the most important part of your body?" he was all shocked to listen to the question at that time. He didn’t expect it. He always thought it was a game between the two.

And then his mom understood the confusion on his face "This question is very important. It shows that you have really lived in your life. For every body part you gave me in the past, I have told you were wrong. But today is the day you need to learn this important lesson."

Looked into her eyes filled with tears and then she told “the most important part of your body is your Shoulder" the boy asks is it because it holds up my head? And then she replies “No, it’s because it can hold your friends or a loved one’s head when they cry. Everybody needs a shoulder to cry on sometime in life. I only hope that you have enough love and friends that you will always have a shoulder to cry on when you need it."

And then I was silent…
Silent for a long time

This story just touched my heart in a deep way. I always took shoulder to be JUST a body part of mine, but I appreciate its importance now. I look back and I’m so glad that in this journey called life I’ve successfully bagged so many for myself. If tomorrow, i want to cry I’m sure that I will have my friends shoulder waiting for me. It’s so strange that throughout our life we engross our self with so many worldly comforts and luxuries which can all be optional, and forget the subtle things that can bring so much of difference to our living…

bug menace..

At a point of time when the whole world is sitting up and awaiting to talk about the glorious moment when the first african american takes up as the 44th president of the US of A, I am so dejected to talk about something that has been so badly sucking my blood out... and that is about the awful, disgusting, terrifying, unpleasant BED BUGS.. i even hate to highlight it but i just do that to show how much i hate them...i get up in the morning only to count the new number of spots they have chosen for the day, and force me to think how many liters of my blood have they suck today. It seems like crazy but i started studying about bed bugs now. what are they exactly.. how do they live... on what all they feed and how they do that.. And alarmingly i find that it’s just not me who is being tortured by these menacing creatures but a whole big bunch of them out there.
For the first initial days of my time here in America i never knew what bugs were like... like a fairy in a wonder land i always heard stories about it, but i never ever saw them... but wait.. What was it that i just wrote?? I’ve compared these gorsy bed bugs with the cute fairies... i dont think i really wanted to do that [:P] anyways, and now... when i moved to this new place and thought that my life would be really exciting now on... i find it coming so true in a different way with these monstrous bugs...but there surely is a bright side to it tooo... im learning about these lentils kind'a creatures these days. ahaaa... but that shouldn’t let you think that I don’t hate them as much as I do..

if i was given one wish at this point of time that would surely be to free this planet from bed bugs...

hmm...

or maybe not [:P]

the menace continues.....

relations

was watching this film Fireproof... and started thinking all bout relationships.
How strange they are
How complicated they become at times
How carefully they have to be handled
And most importantly how beautiful they can make your life least they have been played right :)

i actually don’t know what exactly i deducted from that and what i want to pen down here.. Maybe i wanted to gauge about it here. How good or bad i have been with them. How happy i am with those and what changes i want to bring in to them. Have i been a good daughter, sister, a good friend or a good lover so far....

Or maybe not!!!!!

Today i think about the relationship that i hold with myself. This thought kind a surprises me. i haven’t thought about it so far.... never ever tried to analyze what is the kind of relation that i hold with my own self. i realize that i haven’t given much attention to this one. i have been so grossly entangled in satisfying, nurturing my other relations that i have completely ignored the one that i hold with my own self. And now time has given me a fair part of itself to bridge this gap and keep pace with the rest.

Good luck to me with this very new relation :)

V.O.I.D

feel like time has come to an end.
find myself drowned in this ocean of emptiness.
in a state of emotional void
i suddenly can not feel anything
facking on the outside as good and going

but...

this emptiness is killing me
how do i come out of it
ma mind is dying to get out of it
and my heart dosent listen to it

searcing for reasons

my heart screams out loud
that i can make no more comprimises
yelling to do what it says
and now....
decided to listen to it
no matter its gona hurt me the same

i hate taking decisions
but i have to
y is it that most of the time we will have to do
what we dont want to do???
i hate it!!!!!